Video: Halle Berry Making a Difference for Battered Women

From Denny: If you missed this segment you will definitely want to watch it. Halle Berry grew up with an abusive father who battered her mother. Today, the actress is helping other women get strong, help heal them and their children and build new - and confident - lives.

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This upsets me so much I can't even think of a title for this post

From Sick joke or sick reality?:

"Parental Alienation Syndrome has been used nationwide by batterers as a courtroom tactic to silence abused children by attempting to discredit their disclosures of abuse. This theory is not recognized as valid by the American Psychological Association, the American Psychiatric Association, or the American Medical Association. Parental Alienation Syndrome is not accepted as a psychiatric diagnosis, and has been rejected by the mainstream psychological community. Parental Alienation Syndrome is junk science; there is no valid research or empirical data to support this unproven theory."

PAS is all about punishing mothers, while abused children are denied their safety and the validation of their own experiences.

In Florida, Indiana, Connecticut, Kentucky, Nebraska, Iowa, Maine, and Nevada, there is now reportedly a whole day officially dedicated to raising "awareness" about [Richard] Gardner's theory called Parental Alienation Syndrome, in which the very reports of abuse by a child against a father are themselves evidence that the child is being brainwashed by the mother (and if the child is angry at the father, or doesn't want to visit, that's even more evidence) and the only "cure" for this syndrome is to force the child to live with the abuser and deny ANY contact with the protective mother, who has no history of abuse.

C'mon, you're thinking, what judge would buy this crock? Doesn't it matter if the abuse really happened? Apparently not.

So why is PAS being allowed into the courts?

This month, the NOW Foundation joined other leading organizations working on family law and family violence in a complaint filed against the United States with the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights. The complaint charges that U.S. courts are failing to protect the life, liberties, security, and other human rights of abused mothers and children by frequently awarding child custody to abusers and child molesters. PAS is one predominant strategy being used by lawyers to place children in such danger. A recent Newsweek article noted the finding of a Harvard study that in custody cases involving documented spousal abuse, 54% granted custody to the batterer, and parental alienation was used as an argument in nearly every single one.

Don't Miss: Courageous Kids (powerful) - kids who had to live with an abusive parent are speaking out about their experiences.
Also: A Letter to Richard Gardener (funny)

Woman too smart to have put up with abuse

From the International Herald Tribune:

A Spanish judge has thrown out a woman's harassment suit against her ex-husband on the grounds she has a good education, arguing that had she really suffered abuse during their 16-year marriage she would have reported it right away or sought counseling.
[...]
He said he found it "surprising" that a woman with her level of education would put up with that alleged treatment for so many years without reporting it or seeing a psychiatrist, and "curious" that she is filing suit now, years after the marriage fell apart.
[...]
Rocio Mielgo, president of the Association of Victims of Sexual Aggression and Mistreatment, said the ruling is unacceptable because it suggests that only "if you are from a lower class or have little education can you be mistreated."

Three letters: WTF?

New Studies Show How Violence Against Women Can Be Stopped

A new United Nations Population Fund report released today in New York does more than simply chronicle the extent of worldwide violence against women. It offers 10 case studies that show how carefully targeted and planned interventions can successfully reduce gender-based violence. Check out the cool online exhibition.

"We tried to form pressure groups within the community to discourage violence. Not only that, we also created opportunities for the community to plan their own programmes, and in that way the community began to own the project."
- National Programme Officer, UNFPA-Bangladesh

The UNFP Handbook Ending Violence Against Women, which is based on the report, summarizes specific "good practices" from the case studies. It includes points like:

• Understand the local context, and recognize that culture is dynamic and people are willing to change. Identify and build upon positive cultural values.
  
• Gather evidence and solicit expert opinion. Evidence is the most powerful tool to convince people that a change is needed.
  
• Adopt a rights-based approach, empowering women to claim their rights. Also target men (especially men who have influence in the community), whose participation is key.
  
• Allow space for community involvement, especially when tackling culturally sensitive issues. Involve people at a personal level. Tap the strength of community organizations. Engage local power structures, including faith based organizations.
  
• Separate the values underlying a harmful practice from the practice itself. This is important because it means respecting the function of traditions that may be harmful and remembering traditions can evolve. Encourage change from within.
  
• Work on legislative action, but follow up with advocacy to ensure enforcement. Use the health sector as one entry point. Build institutional capacity and forge alliances across sectors - for example, linking health services with legal services.
  
• Expand women's options overall - for example economic self-sufficiency is important
  
• Reach young people through education, in order to prevent the violence among the next generation
  
• Caring for women and girls in need means considering the whole person, preserving confidentiality and establishing trust, and also protecting service providers
  
• Be creative in raising awareness. They suggest using popular culture, like local celebrities as spokespeople, and trying to educate the media.
  

All of these points are supported with examples from the case studies. Via AllAfrica.com.

What is conspicuously absent is a recommendation for forcing women (against their will) to change their style of dress. Or bombing a country to liberate its women.

Eliminate Violence Against Women

Saturday was International Elimination of Violence Against Women Day, and the first of 16 Days of Activism Against Gender Violence.

In the GTA, 13 women have been murdered by their husband or partner so far this year. One was Malini Thayakumar, stabbed to death by her husband on Nov. 5. Kathiravelu Thayakumar, who killed their daughter before killing himself, had been convicted in 2002 of assaulting his wife.

The province as a whole fares even worse than the GTA, according to StatsCan, with three to six women a month being a victim of domestic homicide. (From The Star)

There's a very strong tendency is marginalize, ignore, or outright deny the extent of violence against women. One of the most important things to do is to keep the issue out there, in the public eye. Here are 16 more ways to help.

Truly, this issue is not just for women. Lots of great resources for men here and here (excellent sites).

More on Women's Rights.